Should they be in my life?
So this might seem like a somewhat odd post, but I feel like this topic is often mentioned but never written about. I think it’s essential to evaluate your relationship with those you interact with. This topic could involve your significant other, your friend or even a family member if we want to get completely serious.
While I had been “dropped” as a friend in grade school before (I wasn’t a very popular kid, reading unicorn books weren’t considered cool. Go figure), I hadn’t “dropped” anyone from my life until my freshman year of college. I had a best friend who had started to act completely different than normal. Due to problems I had helped her with in the past, I assumed that her attitude and actions were a passing things that would eventually go away. Nothing changed.
The only way I can describe best friendships is by calling them asexual (Well most of the time anyway) relationships. When my former best friend and I stopped being friends I felt like I was going through a breakup. I cried, I missed her, I felt like telling her about my day-but of course I couldn’t. It’s not easy letting friends go, especially if they’re your best friends not acquaintances, but sometimes it’s best for you to let go (Sorry if the entire Frozen soundtrack is playing in your head right now). Is there someone in your life that constantly brings you down or speaks/talk negatively towards you? Why are they still your friend?If you have tried your best to be there for them and to try express your concern, that’s all that you can do. That friend, that partner, has to change on their own. YOU CAN’T DO IT FOR THEM. While this is easier said than done, I would implore you to at least consider spending less time with this person. If this person only leaves you feeling miserable or unwanted, help yourself by leaving them.
There are also people in the world that you’re never going to please, no matter how much you try. You will try to win them over, you will try to change for them and you will unfortunately fail (Hence the Recess picture, it’s a good episode). Sometimes people don’t get along and sometimes friends or loved ones grow apart or it wasn’t the right time for them. This tends to happen during puberty, but it does happen in adult life as well. We might look for solutions or closure for these unfortunate situations, but often enough we don’t find any. I wish the whole world get along. Long live and prosper the heck out of life, but that’s not how the world works.
People essentially like being around happy people, because they want to be happy. I want people who care about my life and ask how my day was. I don’t want to interact with people who don’t offer me a laugh, support or advice because I try to be nice and support everyone who wants to be in my life. As lame as it sounds, you want to be around people who get you and love you for it. I have a very verrrryyy hard time letting go of people. It can be a good thing and a bad thing. It’s a tendency I’ve never grown out of. I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt and give them a second chance. Therefore, I have to live with it and make the most of it. So while it can sting, sometimes letting go is the best thing….
What about you? How did you deal with a friend “break up”?
Posted on April 23, 2014, in Past Entries and tagged best-friend, break-ups, college, ex's, family, friendship, frozen, grade-school, happy, high school, let-it-go, love, partner, recess, relationship, unicorn-books. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.